I am the first to admit, the instant I saw the trailer for The Pick Up Artist the T.V show on VH1, I rolled my eyes, pulled a disguested face, muttering “who the hell does this guy think he is, he could never pick up The Minx ( me )” that was until I met “Mystery, the Master Pick Up Artist.

To leave out names of those involved, due to her having a boyfriend ( tut, tut, I know !, not Minxy’s thing ) meets Mystery, real name EriK Von Markolvik, gives number to Mystery, and the Pick Up Artist begins his steps of seduction. I am out with said “adulteress” and text after text is turning Ms Adultresses phone into a sex toy. There’s a =insert name of major Hollywodd talent agency here=party for mentioned T.V show going on, and we should join them, I roll my eyes once again, mutter the “can’t pick up the minx part”, and have hopes( don’t I always, but end up going home empty handed ! )  of a high powered studio exec being there, and saving me from all this sordid behaviour, I am surrounded by.

We arrive at the said event location, hardly up to the Minx’s standard, in West Hollywood east of La Ceinega poor part of Boystown,  to add to the utter disappointment, our main man Mystery is no where to be found.
Then as if by magic he appears, complete with Snoopy and the red baron goggles, and large digital rectangular clock pined on shirt, ala futuristic Flava Flav. Very tall, at least 6 ‘ 5 and weighing in at about 140lbs….and Darling, black is just too slimming, ala Bean Pole and not flattering to his pale Gothic Wizard complexion. I am kind of star struck, and intimitated, as he has this strong “everyone stop what you are doing and focus on me” presence.

He had his 2 wing men, Matador who looks like a greasy Indian/Native American/Latin/Guido/Greek/Mexican/Hawaiian/Somaoan/ find a photo and figure it out and let me know, bloated guy, and is he flexing, and acting cheasy, like male stripper trying to hard. I guess they attempt some “set”, or some other pick up artist trick from one of their manuals, dvds, books, online courses, weekend intensives etc. and I fail, I’m WAY too much work.

No. 2 wing man/riding on coattails of Mystery, is this little British/Australian/looks like a Jack Russel Chucky doll, named J Dog, or something equally un-fitting.

Willy Wonka meets Marliyn Manson, meets Deepak Chopra with a dash of Tommy Lee

They all kind of make me feel like a little silly girl, I think that they’re going to see right thru me, and tell me all the reasons why I am single and childless at = insert age I told you, as it changes daily = I am introduced to Mystery, the Self Proclaimed Master Pick Up Artist, butterflies in my stomach and all, I can not believe I am about to write that “I have never met such a magnetic, larger than life personality in my life”. I was hanging onto his every word, like Richard Gere, to the Dale Lamma.

He told me his life story do far, born in Canada, cica 1970 ish, verging on old man in the club status at 38 ! a Dungeons and Dragons nerd, girls wanted nothing to do with him, his love of magic resulted in a job aboard a cruise ship, and there began his quest to be liked then now adored by women.

He came across very deep and insightful, and seems to have a gift, that you can’t learn from a book or class, that just draws you in, even us haters, and puts you under his Mystery spell, that as, much as you resist, he will win you over. He was so nice and congenial to me, in a very un sleazy, meet me by the bathroom in 5, that judging him you may have expected. Perhaps he just doesn’t like blond, high maintenance feisty madams, like moi ? who cares, I raved about him all the way home, till we got back to said Adulteress’s Lair, and told to shut up, as boyfriend was there…SSSSshhhhhh. As for that relationship, I already may have to go back and edit, I have already sang like a canary………I am half expecting a angry test any second ! gasp.

Strange but true, he was juggling 2 women at the event, that I knew about, had women standing in line to meet him, or have their photo with him, he had Rock Star Status. Yes, all eyes were on him.

Would I go out with Mystery ?, aka Erik, no, for numerous reasons, and the main one Minxy is a old fashioned kind of one man kind of girl, he is already in a relationship……..

With himself, and half the hottest females in Los Angeles and beyond.

Watch the show, I double dare you, VH1 The Pick Up Artist, Season 2, you actually learn a lot, on how you can be received better by others, as after meeting Mystery, when I got home, I set my Tivo, and watched the whole Season. Its not just about picking up, its way, way more than that. The guys on the show, competing for a cash prize and a chance to have Mystery as your own wingman, are duds at the start, and watch them turn into verging on studs…

Season 1′s Trainess….now at clubs in LA and blinbged out Myspace pages galore

What’s this got to do with you ? sometimes, people are nothing like you perceive them to be, if you give them a chance to show you. I hated Mystery, met him and walked away with the polar opposite opinion.

Who do not know, but hate ?